Today I am walking along, feeling all cute in my dress and (moderate) heels until all of a sudden I feel my foot wobble a little to the side. Time slows down and in panic I extend my arms and lean in a futile attempt to remain upright. But my foot keeps turning and with it my whole body tumbles to the pavement. A pathetic ‘Oh God’ slips from my mouth and soon as I realize I have really just fallen on my knees. I wanted to just rest there for a second, a heap in the middle of the sidewalk. But then I realized my pink hello kitty boy briefs were probably visible to all who dared take a gander.
So I got up, a little bloody, but pretty decent. I look around to assess the damage. Not many people in front of me seem to have been looking, but I feel a clenching in my gut as I turn to gaze behind me. That’s right. I was leaving CTB to head to the library. It’s a nice day and scores of people are eating lunch outside. SHIT. I give the thumbs up to the dozens who are now watching me in an attempt to say ‘I don’t care’. ‘I just took a dive -sober- with my fat backpack on and I don’t care’ ‘I actually do not have the urge to throw these designer shoes I have been getting compliments on all day over the bridge because this one moment of embarrassment has definitely not trashed my self-esteem forever.’
The worst part is this whole situation is giving me the worst Deja vu. Oh that’s right. I did this last week. Except it was on the arts quad on an even nicer day. At this rate, by the time I graduate all of Cornell will have seen my clown act.